Between 5% and 15% of victims report being molested.
South Carolina:
The year was 1995 and a group of fraternity brothers were sitting in an emergency meeting. There was big news. One of our own was starting his ordeal with his hometown (Homewood, Alabama) Police, providing testimony that he was molested as a child. Because news media was on campus, Victim #1 chose to tell the fraternity about his molestation. I remember the questions that night. They were all over the map, but here were some of the college “guy” type questions.
The list goes on and on….
It is very confusing when you learn that a dude in your fraternity (and one you regard as being very strong headed) has had unwanted sexual contact with another dude. No doubt it would have been easier if Victim #1 were coming out of the closet rather than the complexity of dealing with an adult molester. It brings up quite a few questions – some harsh, some stupid, some completely dumbfounding, to say the least. The night wore on, and at the end, we all pledged our support to Victim #1. Days and weeks passed. Over the last 16 years I have known Victim #1 and educated myself about this issue on my own and through him. Not once have I asked again the question “How did you let this happen to you?”
To this day, when I think about what happened in the meeting 16 years ago, I just feel empty. this is one of those topics that it is entirely impossible to have empathy for. You just cannot put yourself in the other person’s shoes, because it is beyond imagination. If I felt a rift between me and Victim #1 that night, imagine what Victim #1 felt at the outset, with everyone else on the other side.
To those who are close to Victim #1’s situation in Birmingham, to those who grew up next to Victim #1 and might have had very different experiences with Don Corley, and anyone else out there who might be wondering how on earth this happens without being reported:
An excerpt from the interview above (paraphrased): Between 5% and 15% of victims report being molested. A common theme in all of these cases is “why are you telling us now?” Healing and helping are most often the reasons. Aside from keeping Don Corley in jail, healing and helping are our reasons, too.
As a society and in our communities, we should be actively looking around to eradicate this issue. Let’s find the victims and potential victims, lest they find us too late.
Please see our Molestation Resources, stay vigilant, and stay educated.
This morning I was asked to share my story with the good folks at The Matt Murphy Show on 100WAPI the top morning talk show in Birmingham, Alabama. Originally I was invited for one segment, but Matt apparently felt that the story was important enough for FOUR full segments on his morning radio show. I feel incredibly lucky and blessed that Mr. Murphy gave us so much of his valuable time.
To Listen to the show, check out the November 15 Matt Murphy Podcast.
“Victim #1” was interviewed on a popular podcast over the weekend, and it was just published today! “Cooney & Jones Radio for Women” provided an excellent forum, and we would like to give special thanks to them for their efforts and the time they put into this story. The interview lasts almost one full hour, which is longer than we expected! This interview and our new friends at C&J have opened so many doors for us, and we owe them our sincere gratitude.
Listen to Victim #1’s Interview Here
We’d also like to welcome C&J listeners to 30is30.com. We’ve received some great feedback so far! Thank you for all of your help!
This weekend we heard about extended child sexual abuse, covered up by many, which should serve as a constant reminder that sexual predators are common, hard to catch, and, in some cases, protected. Sexual abuse is seen as such an embarrassing topic for all involved that sometimes the top brass of a respected institution can conspire to keep a predator from being caught, for the pure sake of trying to save their own reputation.
Enter Penn State University. There are many details sprinkled throughout news stories today, alleging Jerry Sandusky, former defensive coordinator for the Nittany Lions, abused eight young boys over the span of 15 years, even using on-campus facilities to perpetrate his crimes.
That alone is a sad story. Compounding the tragedy was the decision not to take action or even cover up the crimes.
“That longing, that need” was present when Don Corley “had everything.” Prison didn’t take his desire away. It merely delayed it.
Help delay Don Corley’s integration back into your community. Help DENY Don Corley Parole to make sure that he can’t make any new special friends. Write a letter. Sign a petition. Act now.